I am almost ashamed to say it, but for the first time in my life, I feel compelled to give props to a person I have personally loathed for years. Not sure if you have ever heard of him, but the guy’s name is Tom Brady. He is the last person in the world I thought I would ever want to listen to or learn from, but I have to admit, he had some great things to say in an interview l was told to listen to last week.
I always thought of him as a real-life Ken doll — plastic, perfect, and fake. His life seemed too good to be true, as if he was born under a lucky star. Not only is he an athletic, good-looking fashion icon who glitters and shines as an NFL celebrity, but he also is a supercool jet-setter who was once married to one of the richest women in the world, Brazilian supermodel, Gisele Bündchen. He has it all, and because of that, I expected him to be a rather narcissistic egotist.
But after watching that interview online, I was shocked to hear just how smart and selfless he actually is. Do you know how hard this is to admit for me? He is a Michigan Wolverine, an arch-enemy of mine because, since my early childhood, my blood has bled red for the Buckeyes of Ohio State. But he turned out not to be who I thought he was. Not only do I feel terrible for how I misjudged the man, but he actually has great advice for anyone who is interested in finding success in whatever you do.
Remember, wisdom is wisdom, and after listening to him, I now realize these 5 reasons he was so successful:
1. Care About Others
This was surprising, here is a man who has every reason to boast:
“Brady holds many major quarterback records, including most career passing yards, completions, touchdown passes, and games started. He is the NFL leader in career quarterback wins, quarterback regular season wins, quarterback playoff wins, Super Bowl Most Valuable Player (MVP) Awards, and the only Super Bowl MVP for two different franchises. Additional accolades held by Brady include the most Pro Bowl selections and the first unanimous NFL MVP. The only quarterback to win a Super Bowl in three separate decades, Brady is also noted for the longevity of his success. He was the oldest NFL MVP at age 40, the oldest Super Bowl MVP at age 43, and the oldest quarterback selected to the Pro Bowl at age 44.Brady is the only NFL quarterback named to two all-decade teams (2000s and 2010s)and was unanimously named to the 100th Anniversary All-Time Team in 2019.” (Wiki Search)
The most amazing accomplishment is that he was in 10 Super Bowls, winning 7 of them, and named Super Bowl MVP 5 times. In all that time the Cleveland Browns and Detroit Lions never once made it to the Big Dance. So naturally, he has every reason to boast. And yet, when he was asked what made him so successful, his answer was rather shocking: “I learned to care about people.” What? Caring about others is what made him great?
I was expecting something cocky or block-headed like most self-centered athletes offer to the public. Instead, he said that in order to become great, he first had to build real relationships with the guys on his team. He really cared about their life.
If people took that attitude about their jobs, homes, and everyday life, maybe they would find more success than they do. Jesus says the same thing, “The Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve.” That is what caring and love is all about.
2. Give Yourself to Something Bigger Than Yourself
Tom Brady plays a sport that requires a whole team effort. And for a team to be a team they all need to work toward the same goal. And the only proper goal that keeps people working hard has to be bigger than the glory of each individual person. To form a culture, everyone has to be working toward one unified goal. But if your goal is only to make yourself great, that is not big enough for the whole group to buy into.
But what if you are a writer or an artist, how does that person work toward something that is bigger than self? How do you create what you create if it isn’t about you and your talent?
C. S. Lewis in his book “The Great Divorce” wrote a great dialogue between two artists who are in heaven. The discussion was about what makes something worth painting or writing about and what motivated them early on to create great art:
“When you painted on earth—at least in your earlier days—it was because you caught glimpses of Heaven in the earthly landscape. The success of your painting was that it enabled others to see the glimpses too.”
To me, this implies two things: being an artist or a musician is a calling. Men and women who have been given the gift of “seeing the higher countries” see and hear things others cannot. They enable others to see and hear by painting, writing, singing, or playing music. Most true artists are moved to do so by a desire to capture and share glimpses of the greater realities. They not only desire to share what they have already seen or heard, but they also desire to see more clearly.
Creating is discovering. But this also implies that it is very easy to distort the “glimpses”—to begin sharing not true realities, but perverted pictures of what paradise looks like. Perhaps this is because humanity is shortsighted. Or maybe it’s because the artist loses touch with reality by focusing on the creative process rather than the creation. The writing process, rather than the subject. The paint, rather than the painting. The musical notes, rather than the song.
Conversation continued:
“Why, if you are interested in the country only for the sake of painting it, you’ll never learn to see the country.”
“But that’s just how a real artist is interested in the country.”
“No. You’re forgetting,” said the Spirit. “That was not how you began. Light itself was your first love: you loved to paint only as a means of telling about light.”
“Oh, that’s ages ago,” said the Ghost. “One grows out of that. Of course, you haven’t seen my later works. One becomes more and more interested in paint for its own sake.”
“One does, indeed. I also have had to recover from that. It was all a snare. Ink and catgut and paint were necessary down there, but they are also dangerous stimulants. Every poet and musician and artist, but for Grace, is drawn away from the love of the thing he tells, to love of the telling till, down in Deep Hell, they cannot be interested in God at all but only in what they say about Him. For it doesn’t stop at being interested in paint, you know. They sink lower—becoming interested in their own personalities and then in nothing but their own reputations.”
If you notice what he is saying, good art is about reflecting a higher purpose beyond your own reputation and skill. It is about communicating the beauty of the light that inspired you to paint or write in the first place. Make whatever you do not about you, but something greater than you.
3. Work Hard and Be Coachable
Do what it takes to be good at what you do and don’t just expect it to happen. Success is in the method, hard work, and elbow grease. It could be throwing 300 passes or writing 300 words a day. It is all about working your muscle memory. And the more you work, the more magic will eventually happen. Success is both physics, working hard, and chemistry. After the work is put in the explosion of success starts to occur. And when someone gives you advice, humility learns from it. No one likes to work with the person who believes they have already arrived.
The key question you need to ask yourself every day is: “Did I give my very best?”
4. Don’t Be Destructive to What Is Already in Place
Selfishness destroys a team. Tom said that he was more than happy to see players who always wanted the glory or wanted everything to revolve around them to go and play for another team. He said he couldn’t wait to play against the team they went to because selfish people are easy pickings.
The old saying is true, “One rotten apple can spoil the whole bunch.” As a pastor of more than 1,000 people, it often seems like most of my time is spent with 4 or 5 people who are never happy. Make sure you are not the person who needs to be seen, coddled, or upset if they don’t get the glory.
Jesus has a parable about how humility leads to success. Luke 14:7-11 puts it like this:
“He went on to tell a story to the guests around the table. Noticing how each had tried to elbow into the place of honor, he said, “When someone invites you to dinner, don’t take the place of honor. Somebody more important than you might have been invited by the host. Then he’ll come and call out in front of everybody, ‘You’re in the wrong place. The place of honor belongs to this man.’ Embarrassed, you’ll have to make your way to the very last table, the only place left.”
5. People’s Opinions About Me Affect Me Only 1% Of the Time
This was the most shocking answer of all: The great football hero didn’t play for the accolades of the fan, or to keep the critic from criticizing, he measured all of his years of play by one criterion: “Do your teammates love you?”
Tom Brady, a football hero, Super Bowl MVP, and a man’s man wanted to know if those he played with loved him. All I can say is “Wow.”
That is true success.
Christopher J. Weeks is an author and has been a bartender, rugby player, salesman in the Chicago loop, teacher in Russia, and now for the last 25 years, he has been pastoring with his wife and four children at a rural church amidst the apple orchards of West Michigan farmland.
